


Progression

by anxiety_junkie



Category: Firefly
Genre: M/M, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-06
Updated: 2006-07-06
Packaged: 2019-04-29 09:47:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14470032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anxiety_junkie/pseuds/anxiety_junkie
Summary: Set six months after the events of Home, Jayne gets injured and the crew ponders on how he has changed.





	Progression

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Firefly’s Glow](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Firefly%27s_Glow), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Firefly's Glow collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/fireflysglow/profile).

Progression

## Progression

Mal and Zoe dragged Jayne onto the medbed, both of them covered in blood. "How much of that is your own?" Simon barked, never taking his eyes off Jayne. 

"None, he's the only one got hit. Pushed me outta the way, woulda been hit if he hadn't," Zoe replied as she sliced open the merc's shirt. Mal had stumbled back by the door, apparently worn out. 

"Captain, get Book for me please? He has the same blood type as Jayne, and he's going to need a transfusion." Simon snapped on gloves and was hooking Jayne up to an IV as Mal stumbled out the door. The doctor shot a quick glance at Zoe, who was also clearly on her last legs. "Zoe, go get cleaned up, you're obviously exhausted. Make sure Mal rests as well." A rustle near the door alerted him to her presence. "River can help me with the surgery, you're in no shape for it." 

"Shia, doc," she muttered as she left. River slipped on gloves without speaking and started cleaning the blood from Jayne's chest. 

Book came into the room, but froze when he saw the merc's condition. "Dear God," he breathed, then quickly stripped off his shirt and allowed River to hook him up to the transfusion equipment. 

Simon barely noticed any of this; all of his attention was on the large gaping hole in his lover's chest. Blood pounded in his ears, though his hands were steady as they he examined the wound. He could feel the panic throbbing in the bottom of his mind, but he shoved it back. He took a deep breath and let his training take over, forcing himself to focus on the body before him and shutting off his emotions as he got to work. 

* * *

Five hours later Simon collapsed on the couch outside the infirmary, allowing himself to rest for a few minutes before getting started on the cleanup. River was sprawled out on the chair next to him, but Wash was still hooked up to the patient, having replaced Book two hours earlier. Kaylee stood by the window with her arms wrapped around herself, watching the rise and fall of Jayne's chest as he breathed. 

She turned to look at Simon, who had his eyes closed, head resting on the back of the couch. "Is he gonna be okay?" she asked, her sweet mouth primmed up with worry. 

"I'm not sure. The bullet was armor-piercing, but the baichi wasn't actually wearing any armor. He got lucky though; I think the shooter was almost out of range, because there wasn't nearly as much damage as there could have been with that caliber." Simon sighed and rubbed his eyes. "It terrifies me that I was actually able to recognize what kind of bullet it was." 

"That's 'cause you've been associatin' with us brigands too long, doc," said Mal as he strode into the room. He held up his hand as Simon started to get up. "You stay there, Zoe and I can clean up the mess. You done your share for today. Take your sister to the galley and get yourselves fed, Inara whipped up dinner." 

Simon shook his head and stood up. "No, Captain, I'm not going to leave my patient. Besides, I can never eat right after surgery anyway." He scowled at Mal when the captain opened his mouth to argue. "The answer is no, Mal. I will let you two clean up, but I'm not leaving the infirmary." He moved to Wash and began unhooking him from the equipment. "Wash, I do want you to get something to eat, you've got a lot of blood to replace. Please take River with you and see that she eats as well?" 

"Sure thing, Simon." Wash shrugged on his shirt and walked into the common area. "Come on River, let's go see what Inara's trying to poison us with." She giggled weakly as she let the pilot haul her out of the chair and out of the room. 

Mal was still frowning at him. "Don't much like my crew not followin' orders, Doctor." 

"Well that's just too bad, isn't it?" Simon replied as he checked Jayne's vitals. "We've had this argument before. In this room, when it comes to anything medical, I am in charge. This surgery was very delicate, and his condition is still unstable. There is no way I am leaving." He looked up at the captain, and his expression softened. "Captain, neither you nor Zoe could handle it if something went wrong, I have to be here. I'll have River bring me something in a bit, but my stomach couldn't handle anything solid right now." 

"Fine, but I do want you to eat tonight. Can't have our medic collapsin' because he didn't take care of himself, might need you later." Mal stalked out, Zoe smothering a smile as she followed. 

Finally alone with his unconscious patient, Simon sat on the stool next to the medbed and took Jayne's hand. "You jumped in front of a bullet for Zoe? I'm starting to wonder what's gotten into you, lianren. You never used to be this selfless. I think maybe you've been on this ship too long." 

* * *

Eighteen months earlier: 

"Jayne, explain to me again how you got pinched?" 

"It weren't my fault, Mal. I saw this guy in the saloon, and I recognized him from the wanted posters outside the sheriff's office. The reward was 500 ruttin' platinum, Cap'n! So I tol' the deputy I seen 'im there." 

"It didn't occur to you that per-maybe-haps there was a warrant out for you, too, after our last job on this rock?" 

"How was I supposed to know they'd run my name? I ain't no ruttin' lawman." 

"It also didn't occur to you that callin' the law on our contact, before we actually got the job, wasn't the smartest plan ever?" 

"Aw hell, Mal, not like I knew he was our contact, since you didn't see fit ta tell me who we was meetin', now didya?" 

"Well, my days of not takin' you seriously are certainly comin' to a middle. I'm half tempted to leave you here for a few days, but I'm gonna need you on this next job. So I'm bailin' you out, but you're in charge of cleanin' the waste disposal unit for the next month." 

"Aw c'mon Mal! You know none o' them cleansuits Kaylee got fit me. Smell never comes outta yer clothes, neither - means I'll have ta do it nekkid!" 

* * *

It had been three hours since Simon had closed up the wound, and everyone else had gone to bed, but the merc still hadn't woken. The doctor knew the anesthesia he had given him should have worn off less than an hour after surgery, so this lack of consciousness was worrying. He kept that fact to himself, however - though Mal would never admit it where Jayne was concerned, the captain was like a bear with a sore head when it came to the health of his crew, and Simon didn't need both him and Kaylee hovering. 

The damage to Jayne's chest had been severe; the bullet had fragmented, and pieces had lodged against several major arteries leading to the heart, making them difficult to remove. Though the largest chunk had miraculously missed hitting either the heart muscle or the lungs, it had caused major tissue damage, requiring him to use a large amount of the precious absorbable sutures he hoarded against these occasions. 

He had forced himself to eat, finally, and was curled up on the other bed attempting to rest, but sleep refused to come. All he could do was watch his lover breathe, irrationally afraid that if he closed his eyes, Jayne would slip away from him. Irrational, since he was hooked up to several machines that would tell Simon instantly if something went wrong, but he had long since given up being sensible where the other man was concerned. 

He managed to doze for a bit, finding Zoe sitting on the stool next to Jayne when he roused. She looked up when Simon lifted his head. "Did I wake you?" she asked softly. 

"No, I haven't really been able to sleep," he admitted, yawning. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, then got off the bed to check Jayne's pulse, relieved to find it strong and steady. "How long have you been here?" 

"Not long." Zoe laid her hand on Jayne's arm, a troubled look on her face. "Tried to sleep, but kept seein' it over and over, in my head." She sighed at Simon's questioning look. "We were pinned down behind a shed at the edge of town. Didn't see the guy circling around the other building, but Jayne did. Shoved me outta the way, but didn't move fast enough himself and took the slug in the chest." 

Zoe sighed again and shook her head. "Gotta tell you, doc, when you and him first got together, I wasn't too sanguine. Didn't think you'd last." She patted Jayne on the arm. "But you've done somethin' to him, 'cause two years ago he would never have done what he did yesterday." 

"I know." Simon leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. "I'm not sure it's just me, though. I think everyone on this ship's had a hand in it, though he'd shoot me if I ever said anything to him about it," he said with a weary chuckle, and Zoe smiled. 

* * *

Fifteen months earlier: 

"Mal, ya think maybe we can go into a situation with some kinda plan, next time?" 

"Jayne, you're the one who thought it was a good idea to lay hands on the magistrate's daughter! How did this suddenly end up my fault?" 

"Hey, she lay hands on me first, I'll have ya know! She weren't in that saloon ta talk, if ya get me. Don't know why she got all riled after, not like I didn't show her a good time." 

"Sir, perhaps we could argue about this after we get back to the ship?" 

"Jayne, next time we're on some rock longer than a few hours, remind me to find you somethin' to do that don't involve leavin' the boat, dong ma?" 

"Aw c'mon, Mal, man's gotta take care o' his urges! Leastways, a natural man like myself does, don't know 'bout you." 

"Who're you callin' unnatural?" 

"I think he meant you, sir." 

"Not helpin' here, Zoe." 

"Sorry, sir." 

* * *

Book came into the infirmary early the next morning, bible in hand, and found Simon gazing at the cortex screen wearily rubbing his face "Did you get any sleep last night, Doctor?" he asked. 

Simon turned around and gave him a small smile that didn't reach his tired eyes. "Not really, no, though I did doze for a bit. What can I do for you, Shepherd?" 

"Thought I'd come see how the patient is doing. Seems to me he should have woken by now. Unless you're keeping him unconscious?" 

"No, you're right; I haven't told the captain yet, but he's slipped into a coma. I have no idea when he's going to wake up." Simon crossed his arms and hunched his shoulders, allowing some of his pain and fear to show in the face of Book's sympathy. "Hypothetically, he could stay like this for years. I can't even tell what's causing it - the wound is starting to heal well, and he didn't hit his head, so there's no concussion. It's almost like he just doesn't want to wake up." 

"Perhaps he's just not ready to yet." The older man put his hand on Simon's shoulder. "It's only been a day, Simon, I wouldn't be too concerned yet. But I do think you should tell the captain, he won't appreciate being kept in the dark." 

"Yes, I planned to do that today, after I got something to eat. I don't think I could face his inevitable reaction on an empty stomach," Simon replied, and Book chuckled, then patted his shoulder. 

"Jayne cares about you far too much to stay away for long, Simon, even if he'll never admit it. So you go get yourself some breakfast, and I'll stay with him." Book settled on the stool next to Jayne as Simon left, and leaned close to speak in the unconscious man's ear. "Now you listen up, son. It's time to come back to us. You're scaring Simon, and the rest of us too, and I know you don't want to do that. So you come on home now, dong ma?" 

* * *

Ten months earlier: 

"I can't believe you said that!" 

"Wha'? What'd I do this time?" 

"You just compared me to- to-" 

"All I said was-" 

"I heard what you said! You said that I was as good as- as-" 

"Simon, I just meant-" 

"A whore! A whore, Jayne?! Is that what you think of me?" 

"No! Jus' meant to say you're great in the sack, is all! It were a compliment like!" 

"A compliment. To tell me that I'm 'as good as an Eavesdown whore.' Why in the tian xiao de would you consider that a compliment?!" 

"'Cause the whores at Eavesdown are some a' the best in the 'verse! But you're better, lianren." 

"Oh good, I'm so glad. Maybe the next time we're on Persephone you can comparison-shop." 

"Why would I wanna do that? I ain't gonna cheat on ya!" 

"Well, it's good to know you have some kind of moral standard. As low as it might be." 

"So, it weren't a good thing to say, then?" 

"No Jayne, telling me I'm better than a whore is not a good thing!" 

Pause. 

"So, how long ya gonna stay mad then?" 

* * *

It had been three days, and Jayne still hadn't woken up. 

Simon no longer pretended to be calm; he refused to leave the infirmary except to bathe and change clothes, and he insisted someone sit with Jayne even during that short period. River brought him his meals there, but dragged him out to sit on the couch for a few minutes every day. The rest of the time he spent studying Jayne's charts or pacing. He knew he was in no shape to care for the rest of the crew if something went wrong, but thankfully Mal had yet to say anything about it. 

Everyone was worried, not just Simon. Kaylee had taken to haunting the place, Book spent at least an hour a day in prayer next to the bed, and even Inara stopped in occasionally. Simon gave the captain a progress (or lack-of-progress) report every evening on his nightly rounds, and Zoe came by every morning before breakfast. 

When he took the time to think about it, part of Simon was amazed at the crew's reactions to the situation. After all, the merc hadn't changed all that much in the last two years - he still spit at the table while sharpening his knives, he made rude comments at dinner, and he and Mal still butted heads on a semi-regular basis. But somehow, without anyone knowing how it happened, Jayne had become part of the family. 

The rest of the crew seemed to think most of this was Simon's doing, but he wasn't so sure. Simon personally gave Book much of the credit for Jayne's evolution from 'man-ape' to an almost-decent human being. The two men had a close relationship, almost father and son, and they would spend several hours talking every day while lifting weights. Jayne's moral standards had certainly improved; Simon was almost positive Jayne hadn't slept with a whore once in the year they'd been together, and he'd stopped insulting River completely. 

Simon knew he was on the edge of a breakdown; he was getting very little sleep, and despite River's best efforts he wasn't eating enough. But he was having trouble keeping anything down, the fear of losing Jayne kept his stomach in a constant state of upheaval. 

It was after midnight, and for the last two hours Simon had just sat next to the medbed, holding Jayne's hand. He had known that he cared about the merc, and knew Jayne cared about him too, even though they had never spoken of it to each other. But these last four days had shown him just how deeply his feelings ran for the other man, that sometime in the last year Jayne had lodged in his heart in a way that only River ever had before. 

He brought the hand he was holding to his lips and gently kissed each knuckle, then pressed it to his forehead. "Please, baobei, come back to me. I need you. We all need you." He sucked in a deep breath and took the plunge. "I love you, Jayne Cobb, and I need you to come back. I don't know if I can do this without you anymore." 

* * *

Five months earlier: 

"Well, son, hear you told the captain not to take that job." 

"'Course I did, Preacher. Not that he woulda anyways." 

"Must say I'm surprised - Wash told me the man offered three thousand platinum. I would have thought you'd be real interested in that kind of money." 

"Not from that hundan. Got a rep near as bad as Niska, and we don't need ta be messin' with that kinda go se again. 'Sides, he's a slaver." 

"Wasn't aware that sort of thing gave you any trouble?" 

"Well...maybe I been listenin' to you an' the doc too long, but I come to the notion that sorta thing just ain't kosherized." 

"Interesting. And when did this change of heart occur, may I ask?" 

"Not rightly sure, been comin' on a while now. Just know every time a job comes up these days, part o' me wonders what you an' Simon would think about it. Don't make any kinda sense." 

"Oh, son, I think it does. Reckon Simon's been a good influence on you. But you've been one on him too, his aim has certainly improved." 

"Yeah, told him he needed ta stop over-thinkin'. 'Course, that's like tellin' Kaylee to stop bein' so gorram cheerful all the time." 

"True enough. Never thought I'd say this, Jayne, but you two are good for each other." 

"Thanks, Preacher." 

* * *

It was fuzzy. 

Everything felt fuzzy, like he was being smothered by the big green sweater his Ma used to wear. Jayne tried to move his hands, found he couldn't, and started to panic. He began to thrash around, and then something was holding him down. He heard a voice from far away calling his name, and it sounded like Simon so he stopped struggling, but remained tense, ready to run. 

"Jayne? Jayne, can you hear me?" The voice sounded closer now, and it really was Simon. He tried to speak, but all that came out was a groan. "Don't try to move, you've been injured. I need you to hold still." 

He opened his eyes, wincing at the bright light that stabbed into his brain. Then the light was moved aside, and Simon was leaning over him, tired but smiling. Jayne opened his mouth to speak but his throat was too dry. Simon held a cup to his lips and he swallowed, managing to croak out, "How?" 

"What's the last thing you remember?" Simon asked him, moving the medbed to a partial sitting position. 

"Job. There was shootin'." Jayne blinked for a moment, trying to remember, but his head didn't want to work yet. Something about... "Zoe?" 

"She's fine. You shoved her out of the way and saved her life. You were hit pretty badly and you've been unconscious for several days, but you're going to be fine." Simon put his hand to Jayne's forehead, checking his temperature. "How do you feel?" 

"Like go se." Simon laughed softly, and Jayne took a good look at his lover, seeing the dark circles under his eyes and new lines around his mouth. "How long was I out?" 

"Almost five days. You had us worried, lianren. Are you in any pain?" 

He sat for a moment, taking stock. "Some, in my chest." Simon picked up a hypospray and pressed it to his shoulder, easing the tightness in his chest, though it still ached a bit. 

Simon put down the hypo and went over to the wall. "Captain, can you come to the infirmary?" he said into the com. He turned back to Jayne and quirked a weary smile. "How much do you want to bet half the crew comes with him?" 

Simon was almost right; they heard boots pounding on the stairs, and Mal and Zoe rushed into the room, Kaylee hard on their heels. "Jayne!" she squealed, rushing to his side and grabbing his hand. "You're awake! We've been so scared!" 

"Well now, glad to see you back in the land of the living," Mal said, his relaxed tone belying the relief in his eyes. "Thought you could sneak outta work by gettin' shot again, didya?" 

Jayne shrugged his uninjured shoulder, a little uneasy at all the attention. "Seems like." Zoe snorted and Kaylee giggled, squeezing his hand. "Did we get paid?" 

"Don't you worry 'bout that, you just rest. I need my merc up and functioning soon as possible, dong ma?" The captain nodded to Simon and left, but Zoe stayed behind. 

Moving to the side of the bed, she just looked at Jayne for a moment with an unreadable expression, and he squirmed a bit under her gaze. "Thanks, Jayne, for what you did," she said, and he shrugged again. 

"Not like you wouldn'ta done the same." The gratitude in her eyes gave him an uncomfortableness. He knew she felt the same when she just gave a jerky nod and left quickly. 

"Jayne, we've been so worried 'bout you, Simon more'n anyone. How you feelin'?" Kaylee asked, still clinging to him. 

"Not real shiny right now, lil' Kaylee. M'chest still hurts." He could see Simon puttering around out of the corner of his eye, and decided some alone time was in order. "Think I'm gonna sleep for a bit now, okay?" 

"Sure thing. You just get better real quick, I wanna chance to beat you at hoopball again." Kaylee leaned in and kissed his cheek before bouncing out the door. 

Simon came to stand next to him, touching his arm. "Do you need something to help you rest?" 

"Naw, reckon I can sleep on my own." He took Simon's hand and squeezed it. "So, y'all were worried, huh?" 

"Yes, we were. Inara even stopped by a few times, if you can believe it." Simon grasped Jayne's hand in both of his own. "Try not to scare me - us, like that again, okay?" 

"Do my best." Simon was massaging his hand, and Jayne felt his eyelids start to droop. "You get some sleep too, baobei, don't look like ya got any." 

Simon jerked a little at the endearment - Jayne had never called him anything other than 'lianren' before, even in private. As he drifted off, Jayne decided it was finally time to put that plan of his into action. 

* * *

Three weeks later: 

"Simon, gotta minute?" 

"Of course, Jayne. Are you still in pain?" 

"Naw, I'm shiny. Got somethin' to ask ya, though." 

"What's wrong? You look like something's bothering you." 

"Well, kinda. See, I been thinkin'." 

"Uh oh." 

"Bi zui and quit smirkin'." 

"Sorry." 

"Anyways, so I been thinkin' a lot since I got shot. Well, since before then, too. An' I figure, I'm startin' to get old -" 

"Old? Jayne, you're not even forty-five yet!" 

"Are ya gonna let me finish?" 

"Yes, yes, I'm sorry, go on." 

"Gorramit, you made me forget what I was gonna say, and I had me a speech all planned. I just, well, I wanted to give ya this." 

Pause. 

Longer pause. 

"Simon? Ain't ya gonna say nothin'?" 

"Jayne, are you asking me what I think you're asking?" 

"Yeah, I am. Marry me, xin ai?" 

~fin 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title:   **Progression**   
Series Name:   **Home**   
Author:   **noandwhere**   
Details:   **Series**  |  **PG**  |  ***slash***  |  **21k**  |  **07/06/06**   
Characters:  Jayne, Simon, Other \- with the rest of the crew   
Pairings:  Jayne/Simon   
Summary:  Set six months after the events of Home, Jayne gets injured and the crew ponders on how he has changed.   
Sequel to:  Home, Chapter 5   
  



End file.
